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Prime-Time Roundup

Posted: Aug 12th 2007 By: CMBurnham

8-6 WWE RAW

Jim Duggan and Charlie Haas participated in a Battle Royal to determine the new General Manager of RAW. This match was eventually won by William Regal.

King Booker (w/ Queen Sharmell) def. Jerry Lawler. As a result, Lawler must crown Booker king in a special ceremony next week in Madison Square Garden.

William Regal hosted the WWE Dating Game. Jim Duggan was bachelor #1. He forgot to remove his wedding ring, but when he did, he said he had a suit, his tie (wrapped around his 2x4) and a "massive piece of wood". Regal said that's not what he had heard. Bachelor #2 was Ron Simmons, who Regal said enjoyed "drinking and a limited vocabulary". Simmons said, "Damn!". Santino Marella was bachelor #3. Regal said he was brutalised last week by WWE Intercontinental Champion Umaga, much like he brutalises the English language. Marella said he was in pain. Maria was the bachelorette. She enjoyed "sunsets, walks on the beach and Rainbow Brite." maria asked Duggan how she could tell if he would be a gentleman. Duggan responded that he wouldn't call her a "Hoooooo!!". Regal wryly commented that "somehow, Hacksaw Duggan manages to remain single." Maria then asked Ron Simmons what he woudl fix her for breakfast in bed and he said, "Spam!". Maria started to ask Santino Marella a question, but Marella said it was him and she should just go ahead and pick him. Maria said that was the worst Santino Marella impersonation ever. She then went back to Ron Simmons and asked him what war he would have prevented in history. Simmons' response: "'Nam!" Maria started to ask Jim Dugan a question, but Santino Marella complained that he couldn't hear the questions because Duggan & Simmons were making too much noise. This provoked an arguement between Marella & Duggan and Regal said he was going to jump ahead to the part where Maria picks her bachelor. Maria said she liked the strong silent type, so she picked #2 and was quite happy to see Ron Simmons. Santino Marella was not happy and said she can't go out with him because they're a couple. Simmons told Marella to "Scram!". At that point, Umaga came to the ring, causing everyone else to clear the ring.

Vince McMahon passed several WWE superstars, including Charlie Haas and Beth Phoenix, before exiting the building.

8-9 TNA iMPACT

Jim Cornette was in his office and Leticia Cline asked if he'd heard from Abyss regarding the stipulations for his match against Christian Cage at Hard Justice PPV. Cornette said he had, but before he could reveal anything, Team 3-D barged in and demanded that Cornette do something so they can get a shot at Samoa Joe and reclaim the TNA World Tag Team Titles. Brother Ray said they're a better team than anyone Cornette ever managed "back when the dinosaurs were around". He said that after tonight, when Brother Devon & Kip James defeat Rick Steiner & Homicide, he's gonna get his tag team title shot. Cornette said he didn't understand why people said Brother Ray never exercised because his mouth was sure getting a workout. He reminded Brother Ray that he runs TNA, not Team 3-D. As far as the tag team titles go, Cornette will do nothing about it until after the Hard Justice PPV. He then excused himself and bodyguard Matt Morgan. Brother Devon said he doesn't want to wait until after the PPV.

Jim Cornette was in the ring to annouce the stipulations for Abyss' match at Hard Justice PPV, but before he could do anything, Christian Cage, A. J. Styles & Tomko entered the ring. Cage said he heard there would be a 6-man tag team match at the PPV. He said that's fine, but he doesn't really get into 6-man tags. He said he was the rightful TNA World Champion and he wanted to face Samoa Joe and Kurt Angle for the title this Sunday. Cornette nixed that and set out the rules for the Doomsday Chamber of Blood Match. It will be contested inside the 6 Sides of Steel, but since Cage & A. J. like to scramble up that cage and try to escape, there will be barbed wire all around the top. If Cage's team tries to escape they'll end up looking like "3 bags of Shredded Wheat". Finally, in order to pin an opponent, you first have to make them bleed. Cage went balistic, but calmed down a little when Cornette said that the person who scored the pinfall would earn a TNA World Title shot at No Surrender PPV in September. The lights then went out and when they came back on, Sting, Abyss & Andrew Martin were all in the ring to attack Christian's coalition.

Brother Devon & Kip James (w/ Roxxi Laveaux) def. Rick Steiner & Homicide. A brief post match attack occurred when B. G. James & Brother Ray invaded the ring, but Scott Steiner & Hernandez quickly evened the sides and the heels retreated.

8-10 WWE Smackdown

Batista came into the locker room to see how Ric Flair was doing. Flair said he's ready. Last week, WWE Smackdown World Champion The Great Kahli "ragdolled" him, but that won't happen this time. Flair said he'd been in the ring with all the greats who used the Claw as their finisher, from the Blackjacks to Baron Von Raschke to all the Von Erichs. Flair planned to put his hold, the Figure-4 Leglock, on Kahli and force him to reach back and tap out this week. Flair uttered a couple of "Whooo!"s and then left.

WWE World Smackdown Champion The Great Kahli (w/ Runyan Singh) def. Ric Flair. Kahli refused to break the Claw after winning the match, so Batista came to Flair's defence. Batista had Kahli on the run and set for a powerbomb, but Kahli reversed it and applied to Claw to Batista, rendering him unconscious. Kahli & Singh then left victorious.