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The Impact Report

Posted: Aug 16th 2007 By: Chance Ryan

Impact Zone Wrestling, the greatest name in Oklahoma wrestling today, once again showed the world why they are one of the best independents in the United States by putting on a show that I can only proclaim as one of the best independent wrestling shows that I have ever seen, and I have viewed some great shows. August 11, 2007 was a hot day, but no one inside the Impact Arena cared, they were seeing great action as usual because that's all that really matters. On this night almost every title except the currently vacant cruiserweight title was put on the line, and the MSWA Heavyweight title of "Bad" Brad Michaels was also put on the line; also a rematch from the week before would show us once again that a certain masked superstar is becoming one of the brightest stars of IZW and we would also be introduced by Ray Martinez to two international wrestling superstars who are guaranteed to bring even more credibility to IZW.

The show started of with a familiar face coming back to announce the show. Yes that's right the Original IZW Announcer, Steve O, was back from his family emergency and he would be showing us why he was the best announcer in the business, but first he thanked his co-announcer/backstage interviewer Ray Martinez for taking his place last week. But Steve O didn't spend too long because he could tell the fans were sitting on their hands, they were wanting wrestling and that's what IZW was their to give them.

The first match of the night would be for the MSWA Mid-South Heavyweight title, so that being said; it was "Bad" Brad Michaels, his first appearance of the night. Brad Michaels took the mic from Steve O, and began to run down the crowd, resorting to the term "retard" to describe what he saw sitting around him. After venting his built up frustration over his continuing feud with the "Irish Phenom", IZW Impact Division Champion Big John O' Malley, he then exclaimed he would be challenging the most deserving contender for his title. I will admit as with the rest of the fans, that I thought it was going to be Big John, but Brad Michaels said this only showed our ignorance, and that the man who would be challenging him for his title was the young, up-and-coming, Nathan Sensation. The crowd was at first disappointed but realized it didn't matter because as long as Brad lost his title everything would work out for itself.

Michaels and Sensation began the match sizing each other up, and maybe in one of the few instances lately, Michaels outweighed his opponent, but what Sensation lacked in stature he would make up with heart. But Sensation would need all of his heart, because Michaels was going to use his experience to even the odds. Michaels showed his experience and his attitude about what he thought of Nathan by slapping the taste out of Nathan Sensation's mouth. This didn't sit well with the young superstar, who proceeded to go after "Bad" Brad, but showing his inexperience was taken down to the mat with Michaels unloading a repertoire of ground submissions. But no matter what lock was applied Sensation would not submit and fought back to his feet. Brad looked to have cut off Nathan's comeback, by hitting a hiptoss/body slam combo, but Sensation made sure to show Michaels he was a force to be reckoned with. Hitting whatever he could to weaken "Bad" Brad, Sensation was able to take Michaels off his feet with a strong clothesline. Nathan Sensation saw his opening and went for the pin, but the experience once again played into Michaels' hands and proceeded to release a flurry of elbows and knees, finally
grounding Nathan with a snapmare, going into working over the weakened back of Sensation. "Bad" Brad Michaels felt that this match was his, and brought Sensation to his feet to unload even more on the face of Nathan Sensation, but Nathan Sensation pulled out his signature finisher the Sensationizer (Downward Spiral) to show the veteran that he was there to win. This didn't sit too well with Michaels, who proceed to kick out at a close 3, get to his feet, and signal that he was about to unload a Piledriver on the neck of Nathan Sensation. But that would not come to pass as the "Irish Phenom"; Big John O'Malley proceed to the ring with a chair blasting the MSWA Heavyweight champion, while the ref Thomas Patrick was "tying his shoe", so with the assist from Big John, Nathan Sensation earned his first win of his career and his first title in pro wrestling, Nathan Sensation had just became the newest MSWA Heavyweight champion! Celebrating with John O'Malley, Nathan Sensation had achieved the first step on the rung of a superstar's career ladder.

"Bad" Brad Michaels proceeded angrily to the back to the waiting members of Impact Inc., Johnny Z tried to calm down "Bad"; Brad Michaels by telling him he would get his title back to him by next week, but told Brad it wouldn't be tonight because tonight, he and Bernie D would be holding those beautiful tag team title belts after their match with Team Shenanigans. And Aaron Neil would be the face of IZW by capturing the IZW Heavyweight championship from "Mr. Saturday Night" Michael Berry. Johnny Z took Bernie D farther into the back to talk about what they would be doing to Tyler and Kenny that night, until Johnny Z stopped Bernie because he felt Team Shenanigans around him, he could sense them, like something was just telling him they were near (there was a sign, it said "Team Shenanigans' locker room thataway). Johnny Z and Bernie D came up to Team Shenanigans' "Locker room", but before Johnny Z could enter, Bernie D said he was going be taking the liberty of kicking the crap out of Shenanigans for what they done to him. Bernie D entered the room, Johnny Z left the camera's sight, and Team Shenanigans came up to the door and, taking the sign off, revealed the girl's bathroom. Shenanigans were sure to follow.

Steve O made his way out to the ring, to congratulate the new champion on his victory, before announcing that the next match would be a rematch from last week's show. "The Future President of the United States of America in 2020" Mitch W. Carter .vs. Black Mamba 5, the man from...I have no idea where. Mitch W. Carter came to the ring without his trusty cabinet, showing his cockiness on how sure he would win. But Black Mamba had no worries, he was just happy, dancing his way to the ring to begin the match with the politician. The Future President began the match by running and dodging the stronger Mamba, until Mamba was able to convince Carter that a test of strength would be the best way to start out the match. Carter took the advantage with a sly overhead wrist lock, but Black Mamba showed Mitch would need to be sneakier to catch the masked man off guard. Going to the ground, the two began a mat wrestling showcase that would make any veteran of the mat surprised by their skill. The Future President of the USA, saw an opening after both got back to their feet, and went for the Carter Climax (Hammerlock pushed into an RKO) but Black Mamba 5 showed why he was truly the Alpha Male, by hitting The Pounce, Period! But Carter showed that he was presidential material by turning the tables and began to unload on the Black Mamba in the corner with a series of shoulders to the gut followed up by an impressive hand stand double stomp to a seated Mamba. A normal man would have fallen to the Future Pres, but Black Mamba 5 is no normal man, by showing us that he had the power of Hulka, I mean Mamba-mania, proceeding to Mamba Up, hitting a big boot, and an impressive leg drop. But Mitch W. Carter showed that he would use all his pull in Washington to keep going by kicking out at the last moment. Mitch showed his quickness by hitting a snap suplex, a quick elbow drop, and a 5 Knuckle Shuffle foot stomp all in less than 30 seconds. But this would not keep Mamba down, and after an exchange of moves, Black Mamba 5 proceeded to sit Mitch W. Carter in the corner, to unload his patented Stink Face, called by the crowd the Stinky! But M.W.C would not have his face disgraced, and proceed to roll-up Black Mamba 5 in the corner, and with the ref not seeing, picked up the win with his feet on the ropes. Once again "The Future President of the United States"; Mitch W. Carter had stolen, I mean won the match, thanks to a hanging (chad) roll up. Black Mamba 5 might have lost the match, but the crowd has been won over by the comedic Masked Wrestler.

A video began to run on the ZorthoTron 420 showing us that Bernie D had indeed walked in on the women's restroom, and proceed to be surprised by Mitch W. Carter's "Secretary of the Press" Marianne Albright. Bernie then began to work his magic by talking smooth to the young Marianne, Bernie seemed to secure a date with Albright, until she pulled out a can of pepper spray an sprayed it strong into the eyes of Bernie D

Before intermission, we would be treated to our second title match of the night; the titles would be the IZW Tag Team championships. Meaning we would be seeing Impact Inc. consisting of the owner Johnny Z, and his tag partner Bernie D .vs. Team Shenanigans, Kenny Campbell and Tyler Bateman. Bernie D came out crying and rubbing his eyes, while Johnny Z was trying to figure out what was wrong with his tag team partner, even proceeding to throw his bottle of water into Bernie's eyes to help his partner. Team Shenanigans then proceeded to the ring showing a bit of a quirky smirk on their faces, knowing their plan had succeeded. The match started off with Tyler Bateman and Kenny Campbell? Because Johnny Z was still trying to clean out Bernie D's eyes, and after a little bit of "shenanigans" the match began with Johnny Z, the only able member of Impact Inc. to see against Tyler Bateman. But the match soon took a twist, and it was Johnny Z against the blind Bernie D would proceed to drape Johnny Z's arm over the rope resulting in, a legally tagged in Kenny Campbell executing a airplane spin; then assisting his partner Tyler to give Johnny Z an airplane spin, while finishing up with a big swing by Kenny who then fell over because he was just as dizzy. Johnny Z was some how able to make it to his corner, a tag in the blind Bernie D, who then proceeded to elbow drop the mat! Bernie D then tagged Tyler accidentally which resulted in Air Bernie after Kenny Campbell knocked him off the apron with a running shoulder block. Johnny Z was then able to gain control of the match for his team, by interfering on Bernie D's behalf. And after becoming the legal man, Johnny Z proceed to throw Tyler Bateman to Bernie D who was waiting outside the ring; which resulted in Bernie D hitting a huge shoulder to the gut while Tyler was hanging on the apron. Johnny Z then got his shots in, by hitting a suplex on the outside to Tyler Bateman, Bateman's back had to be in extreme pain after the beating he was receiving by Impact Inc. But the pain that he was experiencing was going to be turned up, because Impact Inc. unloaded weeks of built up frustration out on Tyler, Johnny Z tried to snap Tyler's back with a camel clutch that he just would not let up on. But Tyler would not tap, even after a boot to the face by Bernie, Tyler would not give up. Bernie D then proceeded to tag in, to hit a huge backdrop before tagging out again to a rapid Johnny Z, who went firing stopping Tyler from making a tag to Kenny who was so close before locking in a single leg crab. Impact Inc. had isolated the faster Tyler from the stronger Kenny Campbell, stopping the Shenanigan Duo in their tracks, Bernie D was tagged in to finish the match so he could get his revenge on Team Shenanigans, after locking in a surfboard stretch it seemed over for Tyler and Kenny but out of nowhere, Tyler was able to pull out a huge neck dropping back suplex on Bernie D after fighting out of the hold, making sure he would have enough time to tag in the fired-up Kenny Campbell, he hit a second rope hurricanrana grounding Impact Inc. Kenny Campbell came in on fire, showing us his fighting spirit; by proceeding to unleash flurries of kicks, hitting a huge power slam on John Zorthos, and after a little do-se-do and Johnny Z and Bernie D clotheslining each other out of their boots. Team Shenanigans hit an impressive double team maneuver, Kenny proceeded to almost hit a standing falcon's arrow into Tyler Bateman's backcracker variation for the 1-2-3! Retaining the tag titles, Team Shenanigans proceed to the back, while Bernie D was left by Johnny Z to cry out in agony waiting for his missing partner, who finally made his way back to ringside to help his grimaced tag team partner to the back.

After a brief intermission, a little plug for Oklafan and Senora's Mexican Caf?, the show was back on

We were then joined by the ring announcer of the previous week, Ray Martinez, who proceed to introduce to us two international wrestlers, Centalla and El Dorado, masked Luchadores from Mexico. He then proceeded to interview in Spanish, with Ray translating. Ray Martinez informed us that next week we would be seeing a Lucha Libre match in the IZW Arena, and told us to be ready to Listo! Which with help from a fan at ringside means go!

After the brief interview of the two masked Luchadores, we got back into the action, as Steve O announced the following match, the 3rd title match of the night. "Irish Phenom" Big John O'Malley .vs. "Special Security Attachment" Thomas Rumsfeld for the Impact Division title. But before Steve O even announced Thomas Rumsfeld, John O'Malley took the mic from Steve O, and proceed to once again to go after Brad Michaels saying it didn't matter about what titles would change hands between the two, all that mattered was what is and was between them, bad history, and no matter what he had to do he would get his hands on Michaels to once and for all finish their feud. Thomas Rumsfeld was than announced to the ring being accompanied by a familiar face, the "Secretary of the Press" Marianne Albright who seemed to show no signs of blinding Bernie D earlier in the night. If you read the Impact Report from last week, you would know that I called Thomas Rumsfeld .vs. Michael Barry match a battle of Behemoths. But the match that proceeded was even bigger than that, it was a battle between Titans, the ring was about to be the victim in this match, but the crowd could not love it more. A test of strength was, first and foremost, the most important thing to start out this match, and surprisingly the bulkier Thomas Rumsfeld actually brought the mighty Irish giant to his knees, but that Irish in O'Malley came out as he proceeded to head butt the gut of Thomas with his mighty dome. But it only affected Rumsfeld by making him lose grip on John, by proceeding to try and knock the ever living day lights out of Big John with a huge clothesline, that missed, they don't call him the "Irish Phenom" for nothing as he proceeded to unleash a torrent of moves, from his famous flying kick to a curb stomp to the back of Tommy's head. Marianne Albright then proceededp to stick her nose in the match, by again getting on top of the apron to try and seduce, I mean, *coughs* grab the attention of either Thomas "Ref-Man" Patrick, or Big John O'Malley which ever one was more needy at the time. But this little trick wouldn't faze the grizzled veteran of big john would proceed in bypassing the back-attacking Rumsfeld into a school boy roll up for a 2 count. Thomas Rumsfeld showed why he was the Security Attachment of the Carter Campaign, by finally hitting that huge clothesline he had attempted earlier, knocking John into the ropes, he then proceeded to use the ropes as an advantage by choking out the Irish Phenom, even applying a camel clutch using the ropes. A 5 count threatened Thomas to actually move Big John into the corner so he could soften up the giant of a man, with some well placed punches, and finishing up with the biggest Irish Whip (pardon the pun) I have ever witnessed sending the over 350 pound plus O'Malley almost knocking over the turnbuckle pole and taking the ring with him. But the Irish whip took as much out of Thomas as it did John, because after being applied in a waist lock, Big John was able to use his large hips to rotate into a huge butt bump taking Rumsfeld off his feet. After a huge Enziguri to the back of the head of Thomas Rumsfeld, the "Irish Phenom" Big John O'Malley proceeded to the use the trusty backslide to get the pin, the win, and retain the championship. But as I mentioned before "Bad" Brad Michaels had only made his first appearance of the night earlier, as he proceeded to come and seek revenge on the man that cost him his MSWA Heavyweight title. These 2 men will not stop until they kill each, there will be causalities, because these 2 men hate each other so much, its going to be a war whenever these 2 finally step in the ring and settle their hatred, if they can, for each other. God help us all!

Steve O, stepped back out to the crowd, to inform us all another video would be appearing on the ZorthoTron420 and that we all should direct our attention to Ray Martinez, interviewing the IZW Heavyweight Champion "Mr. Saturday Night" Michael Barry! He addressed that once again for the hundredth time he would be facing the "Real Deal" Aaron Neil, the man he beat for the title. But as he put it, "It doesn't matter how many times I have to beat Aaron Neil, I will still be the IZW Champion"

The Main Event was upon us, the title on the line, the most prestigious title in Oklahoma, the most important title, the IZW Heavyweight Title! It would be the challenger "Real Deal" Aaron Neil .vs. the champion, "Mr. Saturday Night" Michael Barry for the golden belt! The match started off with a chop battle and with neither getting a clear advantage, boiled down into a classic wrestling match, a classic exchange of headlock takeovers, headlocks, every type of lock, proceed. Until it was "MSN" Michael Barry got the advantage and hit a vicious body slam and back body drop that sent shockwaves into the crowd. But this would not put away Aaron Neil, who started to mount a comeback, until he started to...well how can I put this is a family friendly way...fix himself, or at least it seemed that way, as he pulled something out of his tights. He pulled it out, but not with out being caught by Michael Barry, who proceeded to inform the ref that he was indeed harboring some illegal weapon, so after moving it everywhere on his body, from his kneepads to his chi chis, we got ourselves a one-armed test of strength which resulted in Michael Barry feeling the full force of the loaded punch Aaron Neil had in store for his face. 1-2-yes, Michael kicked out at 2 ?, the champion showed why he has been that champion for almost a year. But it didn't matter to Aaron, who then proceeded to Hotshot Barry's throat into the rope, but MSN fought back and hit a press slam in retaliation. These two went to the outside because neither seemed they could get a true advantage in the ring. But it was Neil who proceeded to capitalize on the change of scenery, as he fired off with another Hotshot this time on to the guard rail, following the rolled in to the ring Michael, Aaron unleashed a body slam followed by an exposed (no knee pad) knee drop for 1-2, kick out, a 2 count! "Mr. Saturday Night" was able to get advantage back in his court, by locking in two huge submissions first the Figure Four Leg Lock that was broken up by Neil pulling his hair, then after a corner charge reversed, locked on a picture perfect hitman style, sharpshooter.
But Aaron Neil was not going to tap, Michael Barry was doing all he could to make him tap, but Aaron would not just tap saving his back. These two would not be the man who ended up down for the 3 count, or be the man that slapped the mat for the submission. Neil somehow survived the figure four and sharpshooter, got to his feet, and locked on a sleeper hold. He was going to choke out Barry, for the win, but Michael didn't let his arm drop more than twice, fighting back, he was able to put Neil in the position for the Saturday Night Special. But showing his fatigue, Neil capitalized by hitting the Complete Shot, out of nowhere, setting himself up in the corner, Neil was going to put Barry away with the 3 Point Stance Football Tackle, but the ref didn't see it coming and was creamed! Michael Barry hit the Saturday Night Special, seeing that he could just use Thomas' hand to count to three, but "Bad" Brad Michaels made his 3rd appearance of the night, interfering on Neil’s behalf, the "Irish Phenom" Big John O'Malley would not just sit back and watch what was going on and he proceeded to the ring, to save Barry, Thomas Rumsfeld w/Marianne Albright came to tip the odds in favor of Neil and Michaels until Black Mamba 5 came in for the save, Mitch W. Carter then came out running to the ring, joining the fury, followed by the NEW MSWA Heavyweight champion, Nathan Sensation...Impact Inc., Johnny Z and Bernie D then tipped the favor overwhelming to a 6 on 4 advantage, but Team Shenanigans was going to make 6 on 6, 12 people were in the ring, 12 people where fighting each other, the sides were even, the ring was about to collapse, but with the guidance of Michael Barry, he, John O'Malley, Black Mamba 5, Nathan Sensation, Tyler Bateman, and Kenny Campbell were able to get rid of Aaron Neil, Bad Brad, Thomas Rumsfeld, Mitch W. Carter, Johnny Z and Bernie D sending them to the back. Standing victorious, the IZW Heavyweight, IZW Tag Team, IZW Impact Division, MSWA Heavyweight, and fan favorite all stood in the ring as the conquering army. Michael Barry then took the mic, inviting all the fans to come back next week, to bring a fan, and to once again enjoy IZW PPV Caliber wrestling for next to nothing.

Until next time true believers, uh, IZW Impact Report Followers, IZW Fans, be ready for Saturday night to once again rock it out at IZW!