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Dusty's Blog: May 6, 2010

Posted: May 7th 2010 By: mikeiles

Thought I would retell an oldie but goodie. Dick swore by this story, so if there is something inaccurate, I?m blaming it all on the deceased.
Dick Murdoch and Terry Funk would ride together to all the towns in the Amarillo territory. Murdoch was a bad driver, and Terry was a wreck a week type driver. The way the roads ran back then, they could make a right into whatever county Canyon belongs to, off one of the main highways. It was a T intersection and the county line was just past the right turn.
There was a constable that knew these two would drive thru late at night, drunk, throwing bottles and cans at passing cars, and just generaly being drunk redneck kids. The law dog would try and catch them before the intersection, but Funk always owned a muscle car that could outrun an old cop car a few miles. Out in West Texas in the late 60?s, the cops didn?t have much more than a radio. So Funk and Murdoch were safe playing this game. Until one night it had rained a little, and Funk had one over the recommended adult beverage limit. Funk went to make the turn, and between the rain, the beer, and Funk, they ended up in the ditch, still in the constable?s county. As they were crawling out the ditch, the deputy was standing over them with his rifle aimed at them. Funk kept daring the deputy to shoot. Murdoch kept begging him not to shoot. The dispatcher kept coming on the radio telling the radio only to shoot if he was in danger, back up was on the way. This went on until backup arrived and Funk and Murdoch were taken to jail. This all took place on a Saturday night, and when these two didn?t show up for Sunday cooking, both mom?s starting asking questions. Funk Sr didn?t know anything, because Funk and Dick were too scared to call and tell him the story. Funk Sr figured they were somewhere sleeping Saturday off, and they?d be seen again Monday. Funk Sr calmed both mom?s down, and went on about life. When Funk and Dick didn?t make the Monday town, Funk Sr started searching for these two on Tuesday morning. And they were in the first place he looked. County jail. Some fines, some community service(1970 style)later, and they were free and clear. Best part took place a few weeks later.
Dick was sitting on his porch drinking beer and listening to a ball game when Funk pulled up in his truck, towing a UHaul. Funk got of his truck wearing a dress. Dick was sure Funk was losing it. And after he heard the plan, Dick was convinced.
The deputy that arrested them was having a family reunion at one of the local parks. Funk was determined to break up the reunion, and he had a plan. Funk was carrying a motorcycle in the UHaul and he had a women?s wig on the front seat. Funk was going to ride the cycle thru the reunion and tear everything up. The deputy would never know it was Funk because of the wig and the dress. Funk put the wig on, and told Dick all he had to do was drive the truck, and lock Terry up in the UHaul when Funk came back up out of the park. The police would be looking for some crazy woman on a cycle, not a truck and UHaul.
Dick gave in, and Funk did exactly what he said. He rode the cycle thru the pack, tearing down volleyball nets and spitting dirt in the food he couldn?t reach. Funk rode the bike up into the trailer, Dick locked him in and headed towards Canyon. When the deputy and a few other cars passed, Dick u turned and went into Amarillo. Dick left the trailer and truck in Steve Stack?s gas station and walked around for about half an hour. When he figured it was safe, Dick let Funk out of the trailer, half drunk, with what was left of the beer in the cooler he swiped from the reunion.

Tags: Dusty Wolfe, Dick Murdoch, Terry Funk