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Hogan signs with TNA, the press release revised...

Posted: Nov 3rd 2009 By: mikeiles

The following is a MySpace blog from native Oklahoman "Impressive" Anthony Wayne, who is currently wrestling professionally mostly in Tennessee. The opinions and views expressed here are those of Anthony Wayne only and do not necessarily reflect the opinions and views of any staff member of Oklafan.

Hello everyone, and welcome to what I'll call "what it said, and what it should have said." Below is the press release from TNA announcing Hulk Hogan's impending arrival, and then, what it actually should have said...

"Hulkamania? is back! The biggest name in professional wrestling history, Hulk Hogan, is joining Total Non-Stop Action Wrestling (TNA), the fastest rising wrestling organization in the world and home to one of cable television?s highest rated shows for young men, TNA iMPACT! The announcement was made today by TNA Wrestling in conjunction with Spike TV at a press conference held in New York City.
?Hulk Hogan is one of the world?s top pop culture icons and the biggest superstar in the history of professional wrestling. We are truly excited to welcome him into the TNA family,? said Dixie Carter, President of TNA Wrestling. ?Our goal is to become the world?s biggest professional wrestling company. Hulk defines professional wrestling and we look forward to partnering with him in a variety of ways as we continue to grow TNA globally.?
?I?m thrilled to be jumping back into the world of professional wrestling,? said Hogan. ?My fans have been asking me to return to the business for many years on a full time basis, but the timing or the opportunity has never been right until now. TNA Wrestling is a great company with an already excellent fan base, business and broadcast partner. I firmly believe now is the time for some change at TNA as they are positioned to jump to the next level in their development and I?m here to work with Dixie to help make that a reality.?
Through Hogan?s partnership with Bischoff Hervey Entertainment Television, the deal with TNA was negotiated by longtime Hogan colleague Eric Bischoff. Additionally, BHE TV has inked a first-look deal with TNA and will be working with the organization to develop new programming extensions of the TNA brand.
?Hulk Hogan adds yet another level of star power that positions TNA iMPACT as Spike TV?s version of ?Must-See TV? on Thursday nights,? said Kevin Kay, president of Spike.

What it should have said...

"Egomania is back!" The most overrated egomaniac in wrestling history, Hulk Hogan, is joining Total Nonstop Action Wrestling, the fastest self destructing wrestling organization in the world with one of cable television's most poorly booked shows driving itself into the ground with the same 50ish year old egomaniacs like Kevin Nash and Scott Steiner that helped drive WCW into the ground almost a decade ago, while the talented 20ish year old guys that could carry TNA for the next 15 years into the future, with few exceptions, make it past mid card!

"Hulk Hogan is one of the world's top steroid abusing money hungry former puppets of Vince McMahon that whines incessently any time he didn't get his way, we are truly excited to welcome him to TNA to help bury us faster than our piss poor booking with Vince Russo, who already helped kill off WCW, already is", Dixie Carter, President of TNA wrestling (should have) said. "Our goal is to become the world's biggest professional wrestling company, and we have now spent an ungodly amount of money on a washed up loser that can't even keep his own son from almost killing himself and someone else and his 20 odd year marraige together, and that virtually every wrestling fan stopped caring about in 1994. Hulk defines everything that is wrong with professional wrestling and we are looking forward to partnering with him, having him take time off from our show whenever it is pre-empted by a something special on spike TV, then listening to him claim that ratings were down because of his absence as we continue to drive TNA further and further away from what it could be globally by bringing in has beens like him."

"Im thrilled to be jumping back into a promotion where I can do everything possible to hold back the young talent," Hogan (should have) said. "True fans have been asking me to stay away from the business for many years now, and I did for a while, doing a crappy reality show that truly sucked and visiting my loser kid in jail. TNA wrestling is a poorly booked company with a fan base that unfortunately dosen't know any better, dosen't know what wrestling once used to be. I firmly believe that now is the time for me to milk TNA for money the Carter family can ill afford because Linda is screwing me for more than I can come up with in alimony. TNA is positioned to jump to the next level on their way out of business, and I'm here to work with Dixie to help make that a reality."

Through Hogan's partnership with Bischoff Hervey Entertainment, the deal with TNA was negotiated by longtime Hogan suck up butt kisser Eric Bischoff, whom I'm sure Hogan will find some way to get back on television also to feed his ego and keep his lackeys around the same way he did years ago with morons like Brutus Beefcake in the WWF. Additionally, BHE TV has linked a first look deal with TNA and will be working with the organization to develop new programming extensions of the TNA brand, apparently under the laughable delusion that Hogan's presence in the company is going to give birth to new shows besides Impact!

"Hulk Hogan adds yet another level of ego that positions TNA Impact as Spike TV's version of 'change the channel, he's gonna cut another horrible 20 minute promo and use the word "brother" 97 times TV" on Thursday nights, Kevin Kay, President of Spike (should have) said.

Ok, I admit, I mean for this to be amusing, I hope a lot of people get a kick out of it, but this is truthfully the way I feel about Hogan. Most of all, deep down, I hope Hogan knows the truth: Ric Flair is the biggest star this business has ever produced or ever will, and had it not been for him, Hogan wouldn't have even had a business to wrestle in. Flair gave his life to professional wrestling, while Hogan did nothing but feed his own ego and hold other back. That is a fact that cannot be changed. Thank you Ric Flair!

Tags: Anthony Wayne, TNA, WCW, Ric Flair