Prime-Time Roundup
Posted: May 6th 2008 By: CMBurnham
4-28 WWE RAW
Kelly Kelly, Michelle McCool, Ashley, Maria, Cherry & WWE World Women's Champion Mickie James def. Beth Phoenix, Jillian Hall, Victoria, Layla, Natalya & Melina
Santino Marella was backstage and said the one thing that always cheered him up were the WWE Divas. He approached what he thought was a Diva, but it turned out to be Roddy Piper. Marella was thrilled and proceded to insult Piper about his clothing, his appearance in "The Goonies" and his association with Cyndi Lauper. Piper finally slapped him and, after Marella left, queried aloud, "Does that boy have a death wish or is he just special?"
4-29 ECW
Matt Striker is in the ring for his interview segment. He said Spring Break was over and now people need to be taught. He quoted the lead singer for Rush, saying "Begin the day with a friendly voice, a companion unobtrusive". He said ECW was becoming accustomed to Mike Adamle & Smackdown was becoming accustomed to their newest commentator: Mick Foley. Foley came out and thanked Striker for being back in an ECW ring. Striker put together a lesson to help Foley. He said we all know about Foley's abilities as an in ring performer. Foley said not to forget that he's written 2 New York Times best sellers and has a relationship with Katie Couric. Striker said Foley was no Gore Vidal and a thesaurus helped. He said Foley had a face for radio. Striker then said that in most people, the eyes are the windows to the soul, but not with Foley. His smile is the window to his uvula. He said Foley obviously doesn't head to a physical fitness centre often and then pointed out Foley's missing ear. Foley said he liked the way he looked. The scars, his smile and his ear remind him of the sacrifice he made to entertain the fans. From the looks of Striker, he never sacrificed anything and he never entertained anyone. Striker said Foley looked like he rolled out of his dormroom after smoking "the pot". He criticised Foley's sweatpants. Foley said sweatpants allow more testicular freedom for him. Foley then put over Smackdown, but Striker asked if Foley knew his wrestling holds so he could call them. Foley pulled out Mr. Socko and said he was there to teach Striker a lesson. He gave a grammar lesson, pointed out "Gore Vida" in the crowd, then applied Mr. Socko to Striker. After Striker was unconscious, Foley said class was dismissed and told everyone to have a nice day.
5-1 TNA iMPACT
Jeremy Borash asked A. J. Styles backstage what he was going to do. If he didn't find a tag team partner, he was out of the Deuces Wild Tournament. A. J. said it wasn't his fault that Tomko went over to Japan and got injured in an MMA event. A. J. asked Borash how Kurt Angle found out about Karen last week. Jim Cornette then came out of his office and told Borash that at the end of the night, he would reveal the 8 singles wrestlers who would join the 4 tag teams in the Deuces Wild tournament. A. J. begged Cornette for more time. Cornette asked A. J. what day it was. A. J. said it was Thursday. Cornette asked what happened on Thursday and after a long thought, A. J. said he took out the trash before going to work. Cornette asked where A. J. worked. A. J. said TNA. Cornette then reminded A. J. that they were on TV on Thursday, but A. J. might not be if he couldn't find a tag team partner. Cornette said A. J. had a little over an hour to find a partner or he would forfeit his match against the Rock-N- Rave Infection.
A. J. Styles & Jeremy Borash were still talking about his partner. A. J. thought Booker T might do it. He headed to Booker's dressing room and passed Kurt Angle on the way. There was an uncomfortable staredown and Kurt asked if A. J. had talked to Karen lately. A. J. said no. Kurt suggested he keep it that way and walked off. A. J. & Borash entered Booker T's dressing room and tried to suck up to him. Booker claimed not to recognise him. He suggested A. J. was someone's little brother. A. J. ran down his credentials in TNA. Booker said he didn't like people barging into his dressing room and ordered them out because he had a phone call.
The Latin American Xchange called Hector Guerrero to the ring. After a commercial break, Homicide confronted Hector. He said they studied tapes for years, especially of the Guerreros and especially of Eddie. Hector said to be careful what they said. Homicide said they wanted to grow up to be like the Guerreros. A huge "Hector!" chant came from the crowd. Homciide asked Hector to be in their corner at the Sacrifice PPV to get the TNA World Tag Team Titles. Hector promised to take it all there.
Jim Cornette was in the office with Traci Brooks. He told her he'd think about an idea she had (which she didn't share on camera). Matt Morgan came in and said they both knoew his capabilities in the ring. He said Cornette owed him. Cornette said if it wasn't for him, Morgan wouldn't even be in TNA. He'd let everyone know who the "Egotistical 8" were at the end of the night. Kip James then burst in and attacked Morgan as the show went to a commercial.
A. J. Styles & Jeremy Borash were outside Kevin Nash's office. Borash suggested that A. J. knock. Kevin had Christy Hemme on his couch and was providing dream therapy. He said sometimes a banana is just a banana and sometimes a rubber glove is just a rubber glove. Christy told A. J. her men were going to rock his world and left. A. J. approached Nash and asked him to be his tag partner. He said there was big money in this. Nash said there was bigger money in the TNA World title. A. J. said Nash's friend Samoa Joe was the TNA World Champion. Nash responded by saying, "Yes, he is" and left.
A. J. went to the locker room of James Storm and Robert Roode. He asked one of them to be his partner. Storm asked why they would want to be his partner. A. J. brought out a bottle of alcohol and put it on the table amongst the others. Storm welcomed him, then picked up the bottle, examined it closley and threw it down, saying he couldn't drink that stuff. A. J. said that was his grandmother's best cough syrup. Storm asked how he could trust A. J. when that was what he brought. He also said the only thing that A. J. could bring to the team was "that skank" Karen. A. J. & Storm go to blows, but Roode broke it up. He reminded A. J. that he was alone since Tomko was hurt. He said neither of them would be his tag partner. Roode & Storm left and A. J. was absolutely distraught. He couldn't find anyone would would be his partner. A shadow fell over A. J. and he looked up. He then asked someone off screen if they would be his partner and smiled widely when it appeared they agreed.
A. J. Styles & Super Eric def. The Rock-N-Rave Infection to advance in the Deuces Wild Tag Team Tournament.
Jeremy Borash was backstage with Sting. He asked Sting to give an assessment of TNA since his return. Sting said Jim Cornette was right; this place was a looney bin and you can never be sure who you can trust. Borash asked what the deal was with Booker T. Sting said that after so many years in the business, that's what happens. He told Borash it was time for the Egotistical 8 to be announced and left.
Cheerleader Melissa def. Daisy Haze
Jim Cornette promised Jeremy Borash to shock the world with what he was about to say.
Jim Cornette was in the ring with the TNA World Tag Team belts. He said 4 teams had qualified and 4 more would be made up randomly from 8 individuals that he called the Egotistical 8: Matt Morgan, Kip James, B. G. James, James Storm, Booker T, Robert Roode, Sting and, in a surprise that Cornette almost forgot to announce, TNA World Knockouts Champion Awesome Kong!
5-2 WWE Smackdown
Mick Foley brought out Batista for an interview. He said he had a great match against Shawn Michaels at the Backlash PPV. It started out about Ric Flair, but became much more personal. The ending was surrounded in controversy. The tape of Michaels' knee injury followed by his superkick was played. Foley asked Batista's feelings. Batista said he meant everything he said about Michaels. He respects him, but doesn't like how he got to the top. Foley said remarks Monday by WWE Intercontinental Champion Chris Jericho made things even more controversial and replayed the Highlight Reel segment. Foley asked Batista if he thought Michaels was feigning an injury. Batista said it woudl make him sick to his stoumach to think Michaels was faking. He told Michaels he hoped he was hurt, because if not, he would be.
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Malik Mayfield
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