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Missy's Manor: XPW Cold Day In Hell Review

Missy's Manor:  XPW Cold Day In Hell Review

Posted: Mar 2nd 2009 By: CMBurnham

Last month on Valentines Day, the great people at Big Vision Entertainment had bombarded my mail box with DVD's. There is nothing better than having Big Vision Entertainment tell me that they love me by sending me XPW Cold Day In Hell, a box set of NWA Lucha Libre, & Omega Uncommon Passion.

I was amazed that Big Vision Entertainment had created a XPW reunion show. I'm even doubly amazed that there was a demand by the fans for a reunion show. I decided to watch that DVD first and I had no idea on what to expect.

My memories of XPW, since I was a "XPW Original" was that they were just another fly by night ECW knock off. The initial show had every ECW cast off from myself, Public Enemy, Pit Bulls, Big Dick Dudley, & others. Plus there was nothing like Rob Black running around with a headset, while thinking that he was the second coming of Paul Heyman. Plus Rob Black kept asking out loud, "How Would Paul Have Done This"? Needless to say that we all took the $$$ and didn't expect much from the company.

Granted the company was among the first wrestling companies to get national DVD distribution in retail stores. They beat out ECW & WCW [who never even got to make a DVD]. My only memory of XPW was managing a wannabe Sandman character in Johnny Webb. Lets take a guy with a cane, cigarettes, & beer and put him with Missy. Obviously people are going to make the comparison to Sandman. Duh! Luckily Johnny Webb developed his own shtick and personality and even provided some memorable moments.

I also remember the company having porn stars working as on air characters and behind the scenes. I remember Tom Byron offering me his leather coat to wear. I refused, since it might have had diseases from his gang banging-tranny-granny pornos. I also remember Rob Black offering all of the wrestlers free-rancid porn from Extreme Associates. Even I had to turn down videos of Kristy Myst & John Kronus being slapped around in bondage films with Nicole Bass.

I had very low expectations on wanting to see a XPW Reunion show. Especially since Rob Black's abrasive personality was part of the reason that nobody from the East Coast was willing to attend XPW shows.

Nothing like pissing off the ECW/CZW/ROH/3PW fans and than expecting them to attend his vision of wrestling. I found his TV revolting. He had a John Wayne Gacy character that implied that he killed children. A skin head manager that had a tattoo of a skin head being crucified on his back. Simulated rape/bondage scenes with Tool with Louis Cypher and Jessica Darlin. Did I mention Messiah brawling with Supreme in a confessional? Then, let's not forget Messiah possibly getting his thumb cut off by people linked with Rob Black in real life. Needless to say that this company had a very bad stigma.

I gave the DVD the benefit of the doubt, since it had no involvement by Rob Black. Plus how could you go wrong with a wrestling show that features Necro Butcher, Terry Funk, Vampiro, & Jack Evans?

The DVD has a 45 minute pre game show. This feature was helpful for somebody like myself that is not familiar with all of the wrestlers. I though the update on Angel "The Hardcore Homo" was hilarious. This guy is the best over the top gay character ever! I also enjoyed Kid Kaos' promo. I always found him to be one of the most underrated "XPW Originals". They even made me interested in seeing him against Vampiro, since Kaos pretended that he starred in Vampiro's movie. They also had a Vince McMahon parody pondering on buying XPW & marketing the wrestlers. I found this character funny. He had the best line about beating the government, unlike Rob Black!

Kid Kaos VS. Vampiro: Kaos took one hell of a light bulb tube shot to the back that cut him up. They spent most of the match going around the building. Once they got inside the ring, they actually delivered a pretty decent stiff match. Kaos goes over. I think WCW missed out on Vampiro's potential big time in my opinion in 1999.

Angel VS. GQ Money: Angel is disappointed at being given a cake for his birthday. He instead wanted strippers. Damn it! This is where Extreme Associates could have came in handy. GQ claims he has to pull out, due to a injury. Angel provides the most offensive and homophobic mic work. Angel decides to open up his presents. Among his presents was a Broke Back Mountain Pillow. Where would one get such a item? One of the packages explodes some pyro in to Angel's face. The match is on! Angel is than attacked by a Clock Work Orange Reject. GQ does a bunch of wacky spots with the 'AB ROCKET'. Angel makes a comeback with a offensive full moon bronco buster that is disturbing. The match takes a turn for the worst, especially when condoms & a adult toy come in to play. Ughhh! A physically limited Steve Rizzono make a appearance in the match & attacks Angel. A video photographer than flashes some pyro in to Angel's eyes. Its GQ!. This match got swerves, pyro, & adult accessories! GQ gets the pin. Crack saves Angel and we get their rekindled relationship. Who the hell booked this?

J Love comes out and starts bitching about everything. This leads to Pogo The Clown killing a bunch of geeks. J Love than calls Pogo a kid toucher and a pedophile. J Love is a awesome heel. This leads us to Sandman saving J Love. I'm amazed that Sandman was able to get to the ring in under a minute. I remember when it would take him 5 minutes of chugging beers until he finally got to the ring in order to save somebody.

Sandman VS. Pogo The Clown: Typical Sandman match, but shorter. Some cane shots and it is done in under a minute.

We are now stuck watching two dueling ring announcers. What is the point of this? It's not like having Howard Finkel wrestling Lillian Garcia. This is a back drop for Tool to make a cameo appearance by choke slamming the annoying ring announcer.

This leads us to Terry Funk announcing that Sabu will not be wrestling tonight. Luckily XPW got a suitable replacement in Kahn Kussion. Notice my sarcasm.

Raven & Johnny Webb VS. Kahn Kussion & Homeless Jimmy: Raven does some mic work and makes fun of Kahn. Raven than does the Jerry Lawler gimmick of doing the announcing to his own match. Terry Funk refs like Bronco Lubrich at this point. But yet he's a better ref than Sean Hanson. Everybody starts brawling in the crowd & uses gimmicks in Jimmy's shopping cart. Raven hits referee Terry Funk with a chair. Funk juices. Sabu wants to join the match, since Kahn Cussion sucks. Raven & Funk start brawling. Raven decides to head to the back. This allows Jimmy & Kahn to pin Jimmy Webb. This match could have been worst. It was fun at times.

Ron Rivera [who needs to email me], Disco Machine, & Joey Ryan VS. Vinnie Massaro, Sean Waltman, & Jardi Frantz: The match was going pretty decent. They were doing a bunch of fast pace lucha spots. Too bad they over booked it with the McMahon imitator interfering against the XPW team.

Luke Hawx/Scorpio Sky/Jack Evans: Finally a wrestling match! They were working a ton of high spots & big moves with no psychology and no selling. It was pretty fun for a scramble match. I liked the idea that it had no brawling, run ins, & a clean finish. Luke Hawx won with a guillotine choke on Scorpio Sky.

Gangstas VS. Westside NGZ: A Gangsta reunion & the phony XPW Gangstas finally collide. I haven't even watched the match yet. My prediction will be New Jack hitting guys with gimmicks to the duration of his song. Lets see if I am correct. Westside NGZ beat up some random Cholo team. Gangstas come out & beat everybody up. Westside NGZ leave. Cholos get the crap beaten out of them. I seen this match ten years ago. Next!

Supreme VS. Necro Butcher: Why does Necro get to be managed by JR Benson instead of me? These guys beat the crap put of each other with glass, mouse traps, barbed wire, light bulb tubes, & more. This is one of the biggest double juice matches I seen in a while. Necro put Supreme in a Russian Leg Sweep into a table with barbed wire & light bulb tubes. Necro certainly doesn't slack off. I always see him busting his ass to such scary levels. This match is just brutal for a death match. Especially when Supreme starts stomping Necro's bare feet in to thumbtacks. Ouch! Supreme wins with some variation of a pile driver in to light bulb tubes. Best match on the DVD. I hope they got a decent pay day for such a bloody match. At least they did it in front of a decent size crowd.

If you like XPW, CZW, IWA, & wacky indy DVD's than you will like this DVD. The production values, lighting, and audio were a million times better than the original XPW.

I got a chance to watch 'NWA Fiesta Lucha' on the Big Vision Entertainment Lucha Libre box set. The box set is a pretty decent bargain. The production values on NWA Lucha is top notch and takes place in a big building. It didn't have a cheap indy feel to it at all. The crowd was familiar with most of the wrestlers, which makes a big difference in crowd response. I'm currently watching NWA Copa De Lucha & that show has also been a very entertaining DVD. The NWA Lucha Libre DVD's are really entertaining and underrated.

Here is a quick review of the DVD:

Billy Kidman & Hijo Del Santo VS. Super Parka & Nicho: Kidman was pretty heavy at this show. He could work, but the added weight was hurting him. Santo busts his butt on every show I have ever seen him on. Why wonder he is one of the most beloved luchadors? He broke out 3 topes and had his working shoes on. Super Parka rulez! Almost as good as L.A. Park. Too bad he lost his mask, since the mask is a big reason why he is awesome. The match was fast pace. It had great comedy spots by Super Parka. Wacky lucha submissions by Santo. Nicho played a great heel. Plus butterball Kidman was in the match. Santo & Kidman won by the way.

4 Way Tag Team Match: The Young Bucks are probably the best undiscovered tag team out there. They can hit highspots and have pretty good timing in knowing when to do their big moves. Everybody should keep a eye out on them.

Joey Ryan & Karl Anderson VS. Los Luchas: Joey Ryan is a great heel. They had a fun xenophobic tag team match with Zokre & Phoenix Star. The Mexican-American crowd gave Ryan & Anderson big time heat. First time I ever seen a American team get boo'd for winning a flag match IN THEIR OWN COUNTRY!

Human Tornado & Matt [Colt Cabana] Classic VS. Los Pochos Guapos: Colt did double duty on this show. I'm a big mark for his goofy Matt Classic persona. The idea of a 1950's wrestler that is brought back to life is awesome. WWE missed the boat on the greatness of Colt. The guy oozes personality. Aaron Aguliera is also decent. He got the height and the ability to be a star somewhere. Kaos is always entertaining.

Adam Pearce VS. Nelson Creed: I like the "old school" tactics & psychology of Adam Pearce. He made this a fun match with the heel sneaking gimmicks in order to retain his title.

Let me thank Big Vision Entertainment again for giving me some kick-ass DVD's to watch. You can purchase these DVD's at www.bigvisionentertainment.com. Tell them Missy sent you!

I will be inducted in to the WSU Womens Hall Of Fame on 3/7 @ The Darress Theatre in Boonton, NJ, 615 Main Street, Boonton, NJ. The show features a line up of the hardest working women wrestlers: BULL ROPE MATCH: Angel Orsini VS. Mercedes Martinez, Amy Lee vs Awesome Kong, Rain vs Malia Hosaka, Latasha vs Jana, Mickie Knuckles vs Roxxie Cotton, Annie Social vs Rick Cataldo, Cindy Rogers vs Jetta, & more. I encourage everybody to stop by and watch the hardest working womens promotion. You can't go wrong if I endorse it.

 

Tags: Missy Hyatt, ECW, WCW, NWA

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